A picture of his bike

Well what can I say about the guy except he owns a motorbike just like the one shown here. In fact it's the same colour! Now I'm not normally a jealous guy but I DO make an exception when the item concerned just happens to be the bike. Annoyingly enough he knows this really well and never misses the chance to remind me of his toy.

Two incidents stand out that I can impart, the rest would cause lawsuits and threats of personal violence against both of us and other not so innocent parties so they will remain consigned to history until Frank publishes his memoirs which will need to be listed under Fiction cause no way will anyone believe they are all true!!

Incident one is the story about the time he offered to take me to the pub.
Of course he had to get some money on route and he picked the cash machine right across the road from the pub to get the money. Guess what!! No wallet. What a shocker and a very underhand trick to play on someone. So of course muggins here had to buy all the drink that night cause I am just stupid that way. He has only done that the once and I don't ever let him forget it. That's my job. Well at least right now it's all I've got to do except update this site into something better.

Anyhow Frank, if you would like to send some piccies of the trips to Assen you have done I will include them on the site and everyone can share in your experiences. Can you send us the details of your little off, in your own words. Start with just before you knew it was going to sh@t and end with 'That was lucky'. I think the audience out there would like to know. Heh heh

Frank has kindly provided the following story of how it feels when life as you know it takes a decidedly different direction from what you had in mind. In his own words I give you Frank and his 'quiet weekend away with some friends on the bike'. Heh heh

Here you are Allan. The sorry tale for your website.

A weekend with the bike and a leisurely drive around the coast road of Scotland starting in the east and proceeding clockwise, turned to sh@t almost immediately.

Day 1

This began with a high speed puncture as I left the Forth Road Bridge. Leaning into a fast corner, suddenly the bike stood up and didn't want to turn anymore. After a close look at the ARMCO and an emergency stop on the hard shoulder, post puncture inspection showed no damage, but one rear tyre had bit the dust. A change of underwear and £120 later and I was on my way again to continue what once looked liked a cheap weekend away, but had already doubled in price before I reached the first B&B.

Day 2

This was the day that reminded me that no amount of underwear was going to be enough. Happily running west along a stretch of the A838, I casually ignored the huge word painted on the crest of the hill that said SLOW (typical car driver attitude) only to find an instant left turn, bored and looking for a silly sod on a bike. No time to brake as I had already started to turn so...

• I barrelled into the bend waaaay too fast, and ended up on the wrong side of (but still on) the road. This of course flowed seamlessly into a sharp right hand bend and, still carrying waaaay too much speed, I ended up on the correct side of the road again.
• Did I mention that both these bends were 1 in 3 downhill? (Quiet roads are recommended for this sort of thing).
• The road now straightened slightly but became a 1 in 3 uphill. Foolishly I assumed that this would shrug off all of my excess speed, but as bikes don't weigh all that much (even with me on top), I reached the sharp left turn before I knew it and, yes you've guessed it, I was still waaaay too fast.
• By this time my nerves were in tatters, and as I looked at the impending blind bend, ARMCO barrier and cliff edge, I decided this would be an opportune moment to test out the Yamaha's legendary front brakes. A grip of death from a tight right hand stopped everything and I found my self sitting on the white centre line of the road, part way around the bend.
• I was just mouthing the words " Thank fu..." when my friend Mister Gravity stepped in and, as I was stationery, perched on a 200Kg inert piece of plastic and metal pointing diagonally up a 1 in 3 bend, I rolled back 2 feet and fell over.

Startled eye witnesses commented on the amount of swearing that was still audible through my visor and over the screaming engine as man and machine in perfect harmony crashed down onto the road. A testimony to my lung power I think. Post crash inspection showed a slightly scratched fairing and flooded carbs. That WAS lucky.

Day 3?

Apart from all of the petrol stations in the north of Scotland having the day off, it was trouble free.

Good news is...Allan is STILL jealous. Result!

Mmmm after all of that I'm not so sure I want a bike. Sounds a bit dodgy, besides I had four wheels and still managed to leave the road and hit the grass embankment. Two wheels doesn't bear thinking about.

Thanks Frank for the input, hope you like the nice formatting I applied. Does anybody..........